


Heavy

by floosilver8



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fix It Fic, Season 4 episode 3 spoilers, Sherlolly - Freeform, fluff and some implied smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-17
Updated: 2017-01-17
Packaged: 2018-09-18 03:26:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9365942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/floosilver8/pseuds/floosilver8
Summary: This will be my last confessionI love you never felt like any blessingWhispering like it's a secretOnly to condem the one who hears it





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to [@solunais](http://solunais.tumblr.com/post/155931190282/cumberbabe-usa-can-we-talk-about-how-precious) for the earworm that led to the title.

_"I...I love you...I love you. ...Molly?...Molly, please."_  
_"Molly?"_  
_"...I love you...Molly?...Molly, please."_  
_"Say these words, I love you."_  
_"I...I love you...I love you...Molly?...Molly, please."_  
_"I...I love you."_  
_"Say these words..."_  
_"I...I love you...I love you...Molly?...Molly, please."_  
_"Molly?...Molly, please."            "...these words, I love you."_

_"Molly?"              "I love you."_

  
Molly woke up with a gasp. How long had she been asleep? With a glance she registered the time on her bedside clock. She had spoken to Sherlock nearly eight hours ago. Those words had been repeating in her head for eight hours.

It was not the way she imagined she would say them to him. And she had never once allowed herself to imagine him saying them to her. It just...wasn't ever going to happen, right?

And then it did. Three times.

The first was an instruction. The second? ...Just following her request? ...Right? Or...not?

The third. ... _Fuck_... But the third time...

The third time nearly made her drop her phone. _"I love you."_

She almost whispered it again into the darkness of her bedroom. To him...wherever he was now. She rolled onto her back with a long sigh, and a spare thought of gratitude for having the following day off. Did she feel like crying? Not really. Not anymore. If only she could sleep off this heavy feeling in her chest and the electricity in her fingers. She reached for her phone now...just to hold it...just to remember the feeling of hearing his deep voice in her ear...saying those words...

*****

 _"I can't...not to you....Because!....because it's true..."_  
                  _"Sherlock..."_  
                            _"...it's always been true."_  
  _"Sherlock..."                    "You say it. Go on. You say it first."_   
              _"Say it like you mean it."            "Sherlock..."_  
  _"I can't..."                 "...because it's true..."_

_"...it's always been true."  
                                       "I love you."_

Sherlock stared out of the cab's window as it rolled through town. His body and mind were shattered. The high of the case had long passed, and he was just left with the withdrawal...and Molly's voice. Molly's breathy voice on a loop drowning out every other sound in the world.

_"Because..."_

He should have known...he did know? Didn't he. The Christmas party all those years ago...but...surely not. He wasn't the type of person who deserved...that... _her_... Her time, her attention, her devotion...her love...

Suddenly the air was too heavy, too hot. He needed to get out of the car.

"Here's fine," he called to the cabbie and threw too many bills through the divider. The car hadn't even come to a full stop before he was leaping out and nearly running away.

_"Because!....because it's true..."  
             "Sherlock..."_

"It's always been true," he says to her front door.

Sherlock blinks the cobwebs away. How did he even get here? Had he known he was close when he stopped the cab? Maybe? Maybe he had been on the other side of the planet until right now.

He reached into his pocket for his keys. Of course she had given him one to her flat. Ages and ages ago. How many times had he used it? Just walked right in? She usually greeted him with a smile...usually.

He was about to walk right in again, but something stopped him. Actually, he stopped himself. What if...

_Are you awake? - SH_

He sent the text before he could think better of it and just leave.

_Yes - Mx._

She replied quickly. The phone must have been in her hand already. Sherlock leaned against her front door and smiled to himself. One little "x" sent his pulse racing.

*****  
She signed with one little "x"...as always. She had been doing that since the invention of texting. Well, commercial usage at least...well, when she got her first mobile in uni... Anyway, it's not like...like it mattered anymore.

Molly snuggled further under the duvet for self preservation and let out a long sigh.

_May I come in? - SH_

His request came as a shock. In all the years he'd kipped at hers, he'd never once asked first. How many nights had that been? Some years more than others of course...

Wait...he said "in" not "over". Surely he wasn't...right outside...

 _Yes - Mx_  
  
She replied and then held the phone to her chest. Her heart beat in her throat as she heard his key in the lock. His soft footsteps on her hall rug...his hand turning the knob on her bedroom door...

"Sherlock," she whispered, almost pleading.

****

Her voice made him pause in the doorway. The moonlight filtering through her soft window shades was enough for him to navigate to her bed...but he just wanted to savour it all for a moment. Her scent...her essence...it was like drowning in heaven.

She sat up, her eyes wide in the dim light. "Sherlock," she said again, this time an important question going unspoken.

Sherlock swallowed the lump in his throat and looked at his feet. He needed a moment. Just a moment to consider...everything. He carefully stepped toward her and knelt at her side.

"Molly," he whispered, searching her face in the darkness, "I love you."

He couldn't decide if that was an apology or a declaration. The words felt different on his tongue this time. Better somehow. It was probably the fact that no one was in any imminent danger. Or that he could hear her small intake of breath in person. The blood pounding in his ears was a strange yet pleasant side effect of this particular emotion.

Molly licked her lips and took a deep breath. She studied his face for a moment before moving her duvet aside and shifting to face him better.

Sherlock sat up a little straighter when she pushed his coat off his shoulders. Her dainty little fingers on the buttons of his shirt were tentative...and that stirred something in his belly he hadn't felt in a while. Lust consumed him and suddenly his lips were on hers. Her hands clutched at his shirt, drawing him closer and up onto her bed.

Her frame moved under him, working his shirt off, pressing up with her hips...it was too much and not enough. His hands found the skin under her pajama top. He couldn't help but think he had an unfair advantage here. Her warm skin...mmmm...drove him mad.

****

Molly couldn't believe she had just started this. His confession...or apology? made her snap. Maybe she was testing him...maybe she was going insane and this was all a dream. But oh, the weight of him seemed real. His hands on her breasts....his mouth on her neck, whispering "I love you, I love you, I love you..."

They made love for what felt like days. Slow, steady, saying things with their bodies they hadn't found the words for just yet. And when sleep finally consumed them both, it was to the rhythm of their repeated, "I love you."

When Molly woke in the morning the first thing she noticed was the weight of the person next to her in bed. The second thing she noticed was the way he smiled when he said, "Good morning...I love you."


End file.
